Handy Dandy Helpful Hints

We all know the kid, or have been the kid ourselves, who jumps out of bed at 6:00 a.m. on Christmas morning with a rush of adrenaline that equates to being in the first ‘car’ of a peaking roller coaster.  The NCAA tournament is my Christmas and I have gone Benjamin Button, returning to my 7-year-old giddy self.  My bracket is filled out and I have nothing else to offer besides both sets of index and middle fingers tightly crossed for good luck.  But as the opening first and second round games open up, I thought just for fun I’d share a few of my good luck/bad luck ideas to embrace or avoid.

Firstly, for most of us, our brackets will be busted.  The key is to not to overreact to soon.  “Let the game come to you.”  Just because you lose one final four team opening weekend doesn’t mean your donzo.  My suggestion: Crumple, don’t tear!  Your sheet/bracket is your lifeline.  Feel free to show the world your anger by rolling up your paper and kicking it across the room when your elite 8 gets blown out by 17.  But keep your senses.  Go pick up the crumpled potential golden ticket, peel it back to form, cross off your loser and keep it moving.  It’s been my opinion that a once crumpled sheet has more depth to it, more personality.  It shows you care.  You know how the Express brand of clothes sell jeans with holes and stains on them, like they’ve been worn for years?  Same idea here.  DO NOT TEAR YOUR SHEET.  It’s just disrespectful. 

Another tip:  DO NOT highlight or circle your winner until the final horn goes off!  What is the downside in waiting the extra 5 minutes?  Believe me, I know how bad we want to circle that potential winner with 3:41 left up by 11, but in doing so you’ll add “jinx juice” to embers and coals which can quickly turn into a bright flame should the potential loser hit back to back three’s.  The rule I’ll hold myself to this year will be that my potential winner will have to be up by 14 or more with under two minutes before I do any highlighting whatsoever.  No exceptions.  I’d also be careful of jinxing yourself by changing the channel away from a game for more than 3 minutes at a clip, if that said game has 10 minutes or less left.  Stay on top on your games.  Don’t let the ticker at the buttom of the screen be your boss.  You’re better than that. 

 

Lastly, If you picked Notre Dame to get out of this opening weekend, here’s my suggestion.  Pray.  Notre Dame is a religious institution that, come tournament time, relies on your little conversations with the Almighty.  For as good as we think this team is, we’ve seen this movie before.  This ‘blessed’ team always seems to fall on their face in March, and I believe it’s a lack of falling on our knees.  Since 1980 the Irish have participated in March Madness 14 times.  In 11 of those tournaments, Notre Dame has been booted in the first or second round and has never once in those 14 appearances been to the elite 8.  Hail Mary’s, Our Father, whatever you choose, the Irish will surely appreciate it.  May luck be with you. (And also with you).

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3 Responses to Handy Dandy Helpful Hints

  1. Duke4Life says:

    LLEEGOOOOOOOOO

  2. Anonymous says:

    Wow I didn’t listen to Byesline and it almost cost me UCLA!! I highlighted and went to bed when they were up 21 with about 10 to go. I won’t be doing that again.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Byesline, you are funny. Enjoyable read.

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