Yesterday I compared the Monday Night Football game between the Jets and Patriots to opening up a Christmas gift early.  Turns out the gift was nothing more than steaming hot garbage with a bow on it.  Tom Brady had a large hand in making the mega-matchup virtually unwatchable as he imposed his will on the Jets defense time and time again.  With 4 touchdown passes and a total of 326 passing yards, there was little Brady couldn’t do.  The Jets on the other hand looked like their record should have been 2-9 coming into the game instead of 9-2 as nearly every single facet of the contest was lost to New England.  The once highly regarded Jets Defense gave up yards in the air and on the ground all night.  When the ‘Gang-Green’ special teams wasn’t shanking field goals as bad as you will ever see at the NFL level, they were botching punts.  Even though the Pats came into Monday with the 32nd ranked passing defense in the league, Mark Sanchez in the cold weather was as effective as Mark Sanchez in the cold weather.  Where’s  Keanu Reeves from ‘The Replacements’ when you need him?  Not to take anything away from New England who came into the game with a NFL record 25-game home winning streak.  Tom Brady went without throwing a interception for his 7th game in a row, and this season only has 4 interceptions total to go along with his 27 TD’s.  Stupid numbers.  At 10 wins and one of the finest season’s of his career, there is no reason why Brady shouldn’t be leading the MVP conversation.

Later dude!  Josh Mcdaniels has been shown the door in Denver as the Bronco’s brass fired him on Monday.  McDaniel’s has made a slew of bad decisions that led to unemployment including trading Peyton Hillis, a running back who now does work  in Cleveland.  Casey Wiegmann was also let loose only to turn around and prosper in Kansas City (Who now has a top rushing offense in the league).  McDaniels was also the guy who drafted Tim Tebow in the first round?  (Notice how there’s still a question mark).  Not to mention the young enthusiastic coach hired the videographer who turned around and videotaped the 49ers practice before Denver played them.  Tisk tisk.  Now Josh McDaniels will join the likes of other ‘Lost Boys’  Wade Phillips and Brad Childress in coaching ‘Never Never Land’.

News Flash:  The NBA’s most talented team has won 5 games in a row!  The Miami Heat are putting the pieces together picking up another victory in Milwaukee Monday night.  An encouraging aspect to take away from the Heat is that Dwayne Wade snagged 14 rebounds.  Why is this a big deal?  Because Miami is starting to find other ways to win games besides outscoring opponents.  Granted, Wade finished with 25 points to go with the boards, but rebounding is a dirty job.  Very little glory involved, so this is typically not on the top of any superstars list of ‘things to do’.  (The List: 1: Be a star.  2: Do your thang.  3: Get Buckets.  4: Smile.  5: Practice pre-game handshakes.  6: Hit your twitter.  7: Rebound the ball if it comes to you).  I say that in jest, but not taken lightly is the passion and desire it takes to compete on the glass like Wade did.  This is a championship trait that Miami has been missing through their first 20 games. 

 
 

Smile!

Notes and Shoutouts:  Remember Lawrence Taylor?  Not the great football player and MVP that led the Giants to 2 superbowls, but his alter ego L.T.  You remember who I mean right?  The nut who used to bump lines of cocaine during halftime of games?  Now you remember!  Last year good ol’ LT slept with a 16-year old prostitute for $300 cash.  Classy.  The girl was actually a runaway from the Bronx, who Taylor believed to be 19.  ‘Whoopsie daisy’ right Lawrence?  LT’s lawyer is trying to get the charges dropped like LT used to drop opposing Quarterbacks.  In honor of LT I’d like to pump you with a few of my favorite LT Quotes: “In football, you can always maim a person if you wanted to”.   “LT was just a wilder person.  I don’t go that route no more”.    “Most of the games dont let you focus to much on the cheerleaders.  But I’ve been watching these girls”.   “They would almost throw the cops in jail when they tried to arrest me”.   I have toes and fingers crossed that LT and OJ share a cell.  Imagine those late-night bunk talks!  What I would give to be a shank on the wall!

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10 Responses to

  1. Nate says:

    Can we say that the Heat are putting it together yet? They do have a five game win streak but those five games were against the Wizards, Pistons, Cavs, Hawks, and Bucks. All five are Eastern Conference teams that wouldn’t stand a chance in the West. The Hawks and Bucks will make the playoffs simply because the East has nobody else. Furthermore, beside the Cavs and Pistons (arguably the two worst teams in the league) the Heat aren’t blowing anyone out either.

    I’ve caught a lot of Heat games this year (thanks NBA League Pass!) and, even in this 5 game stretch, that don’t seem to have their offense figured out. This team is built for Mike D’Antoni-get-out-and-run-and-put-up-100-shots ball, but instead Dwade and LeBron take turns going 1 on 5 with the occasional kick out to James Jones from three or Chris Bosh at the elbow. For me to start believing in this team, somethings got to give.

    • Rocco DiJohn says:

      Ya but in those 5 games they have blown the teams out of the gym! Wade and Lebron aren’t getting in each others way on the break anymore and there each getting more dunks and spreading the court a lot better. Jones is shooting the ball well but even bosh has put up double doubles in those games which is a great sign for them. I still think bosh is taking to many jumps but its still in the works. Don’t forget Wade missed all of training camp, so there just hitting that point right now. I think all the players just not the big 3 are learning there rolls. Heat will keep rolling, I promise. The big 3 have stuck together threw all the hate and losing streak, things got shakky but they didn’t break and thats a great sign for those guys. Everyone hop on the highlight bangwagon because the partys started!

      • JB says:

        Roc the Heat will get into the playoffs as a 5 seed because as Nate points out, the East is a joke. They’ve got three of the top teams (Bos, Orl, Mia) and a slew of garbage teams that don’t stand a chance. I do agree that their nearly 20 point win margin during this streak is very impressive, but winning streaks can be deceiving (Hornets anyone?).
        Bosh is playing well, but he has yet to get in to the dogfight of a 7 game series with a boston or LA. Can he handle it? All I know is the regular season has, to me, been proven to be fickle. The Cavs the past two years looked unstoppable, only to be crushed in their series with Boston/Orlando. How about Boston last year limping in, only to cruise through to the Finals? Talk to me about Heat bandwagon if their prying the OBrien out of Kobes cold, dead hands baby!

  2. JB says:

    Zach very good post and very funny.

    What a contrast the Pats v. Jets game was to Sunday night, where the game actually lived up to the hype. I was able to go to bed at halftime last night knowing I wouldn’t miss much. By the way, what was up with Santonio Holmes celebrating and gesturing to the crowd in the second quarter… After a first down pickup… DOWN 24-3?! There’s a difference between being a showboat and being flat out stupid. Holmes made sure there was no doubt which he one was. From what I heard on the radio today, L.T and Greene were doing the same thing in the second half?! Apparently the Rex Ryan disease of talking smack without having won anything is really taking effect!

  3. Rocco DiJohn says:

    So Happy we got rid of that loser Joe Harris. I kicked his ass in the Poll and hes gone for good, We can talk about sports now without some wack job entering in. Love the Post Zach!!

    • JB says:

      Rocco now you’ve gone and called him out! You know he’s still reading the blog and comments. He’ll be back even if it means a new alias. I could be Joe Harris for all you know lol

    • Intelligent People Everywhere says:

      I’m happy you won Rocco.

  4. Rocco DiJohn says:

    Okay Okay Okay, Lets see how many people hop on the Heat now…Just to let you know there still getting better!

  5. L.T. says:

    woof woof

  6. shupperstar says:

    If there was a caps lock for a question mark, I would use it, and put it right at the end of the term, “Jets Defense”, in size 72 font, bold, underlined, asterisk. That was an unbelievably poor showing for a team with ‘lock-down corners”. It looked more like locked-up ankles. Their playoff heartbeat is fading fast with a showing like that. McDaniels is a clown. His first mistake was getting rid of Brandon Marshall, who was the best thing to happen to Denver since Elway. The Heat are the Heat. You can’t put guys like that together and expect them to look like trash for long. If that means they have a legit shot at some rings, remains to be seen. D-Wade, just keep being a slasher/rebound (RG 1). Somewhere on the “Superstars list of things to do” needs to be blowin’ coke and rapin’ bitches, although they could probably fit on the category. As far a L.T., you just can’t teach an old dog new tricks.

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